Say Goodbye and Move On
Troy Simpson, VP of Member Services at Mid-Carolina Electric Cooperative, delivered a thought-provoking message and challenged the audience at Tuesday’s monthly Greater Lexington Chamber breakfast.
Simpson, who was in banking and then the ministry for 20 years before moving to MCEC, talked about Necessary Endings, a book by bestselling author Dr. Henry Cloud. The book discusses how it’s sometimes necessary to bring something to an end in order to make a positive transition.
A friend recommended the book to Simpson about a year and a half ago when he was wrestling with a change. And what a difference the book made in Simpson’s life.
“I realized that I was at a crossroads at so many more levels than even I realized, and I didn’t like what I saw,” Simpson said. “It wasn’t just time for a change. It was time for an ending. It was time for a necessary ending. It gave me the tools to see myself in an honest light.”
That’s part of the challenge Simpson set forth – digging a little deeper and looking at oneself in an honest light. He wanted everyone to reflect on that, even those who may come to the breakfast for a meal and some networking and aren’t necessarily open to a lot of the “soft stuff.”
Simpson urged everyone to simply ask a few questions.
Is there anything in my life, personally, professionally, or otherwise, that I need to change? Is there anything that needs to come to an end that I’ve been putting off? Is there any part of your business, your family life, of your business relationships that could use a little tweaking? What are you going to do about that?
“The easiest thing to do is keep your business face on, nod and smile and walk back out that door,” Simpson said.
But that won’t initiate the necessary change.
“We avoid the needed dialogue. We dance around the truth,” he said. “We put off until tomorrow what should be taken care of today. And in doing so, we miss the opportunity of a new season.”
Simpson is also quick to warn that a new season can’t begin until you act on the current situation, which is sometimes very difficult to do.
“We choose to remain in what’s comfortable even though it’s very, very painful. We choose to remain in a jail cell, where the doors have already been opened, but we’re so accustomed to that place and that space,” he said. “We dress that cell up, and we call it home.”
Simpson believes one key is talking to someone that will hold you accountable in this journey toward change.
“Take some time to think. Ask the opinion of somebody who knows you and your circumstance well,” he suggested. “Ask someone to hold you accountable to this ending, because it would be just as easy not to follow through. So many times we hear great stuff, and it stops right there. We fail with the application.”
The book can assist in getting you to that place and push you toward the realization that there are necessary endings.
“I’ve seen the simple principles of this book work from the boardroom to the classroom, from the home front to the storefront,” Simpson said. “Endings are necessary. They’re an essential part of life. We just need to be able to recognize when something’s time has passed and bravely move into that next season.”
Simpson also understands there will be times when an ending isn’t the immediate answer.
“There are times when you have to hang in there and get it done. You have to gut it out,” he said. “You may have to walk through a season of sacrifice to get it done. I get that. If that’s your season right now, finish the job.”
He also warns that endings need to happen in the right way.
“There’s an honorable way to walk transitions out,” Simpson said. “How you do it matters.”
“I believe the bottom line is this. It’s time to get honest. To let things remain as they are is wrong,” he said. “We all know the outcome historically when good people do nothing. When they settle for status quo, when they take the path of least resistance, or they fear rocking the boat, nobody wins. We settle for what looks like comfort, and it leads to the downfall of something or somebody.”
Simpson challenged the audience to consider what season they are in, both in business and in their personal lives.
“What circumstance do you need to address? What steps will you take beginning today to make it a reality? What are you willing to do to stop it?” Simpson asked. “It is my hope that we will all stand up and end something so that a new season can begin.”
The breakfast was sponsored by Palmetto Health.